Relationship Refelctions

There are a few relationships in my life that I would consider to be close relationships.  This would include my significant other, my best friend, and my children.


My significant other:

While I am not married to my significant other, we have known each other for almost sixteen year now.  He knows me better than any other person.  He is my main support, and always supports me in whatever I do in my life.  He is my cheerleader, and always makes me laugh when I am feeling down. 

I am glad that Ken and I meet in a time when texting and emailing where not so popular, I feel that this made us learn how to communicate with each other.  To this day we rarely text each other, but we do talk on a daily basis.  I would defiantly say that our relationship is based on mutual respect for each other, and that we balance our time so that we can each pursue our hobbies and interests, but yet spend time together.  We have always been honest with each other, even when it has been hard to say things that may hurt the other person.  This year my son graduated from high school, he was my last child at home, in August Ken and I will be moving in together to start a new chapter in our life’s.   I would defiantly say that Ken is my partner in life because we talk about decisions, and we work on lifting each other up. 

ken and me




My best friend:

I have known Cristina for nine years now, and feel like she is my best friend.  Being friends was easy with her because we have so many things in common.  I have always enjoyed conversations with her, and have been able to talk to her about things that I have never told anyone before.  We have mutual trust, and we always support each other.  The thing that I love about Cristina is her unconditional love, and that she is never judgmental.  And while, with life circumstances, we do not see each other very often, when we do get together, it seems like we just saw each other the day before.  I feel that what made our relationship so strong is the building of trust, and being able to be there for each other.  I think that what has made our relationship work is that we honestly value our friendship, and both put effort into making it work.  She is just that person that I can always turn to when I need to talk to someone about something that may not be something that I need to share with Ken. She also helped me heal from many of my past hurts, and I feel that we support each other.  I would say that this relationship is a give and take relationship as well.  We both put effort in to maintaining the relationship, even if it is a text, or a message on Facebook.

me and cristina

My children:

I have three children, they are 24, 21 and 18.  The two oldest are my girls, and then the youngest is my son.  They mean everything to me, and are the world to me.  I would say that our relationships have been changing since they have grown up and moved out of the house, but they are three very important relationships.  I would even say that each of my relationships that I have with my children are different, but even though they no longer live with me, we stay in contact, and they know that I am here for them.  I like where are relationships are now, and they know I will be here for them whenever they need me.  I do not have a big family, and even less extended family that live in Wisconsin.  I think that over time what I realized about our relationships is that I have learned to allow them to live their lives, support their choices, and today we can talk about anything.  While they thought I was maybe a tough parent, I think that in hindsight they are starting to appreciate everything that I did do for them and the way that I parented them.  Today my oldest daughter calls me and asks for parenting advice, and we often laugh about stories from the past. 


This is an older photograph of us, but the last one I have of us all together.

Insights into relationships:  What I have realized over the years is that relationships are give and take.  They take effort on both sides and that they take time.  I feel that when relationships start, it takes time to build trust, as well as to give parts of yourself to another person.  I feel that relationships take a lot of communication, and they require an investment of time.  I have always believed that people come into your life for a reason.  They may only be in your life for a very short time, or they may be a part of your life for as long as you live.  I feel that the biggest challenge for making relationships work is that you need to put time and effort into them.  Today life can get busy, but I try to make an effort to stay in contact with those who mean the most to me.   I also feel that for relationships to work you need to be able to be honest, and to be able to understand how that person feels, and sometimes it means that you do not always agree about what they are doing in their life, but you still find a way to support them.  In the relationships that I have listed above I feel that the main characteristics that make them work are; mutual respect, honesty, give and take, and communication. 

Relationships in my profession:  I feel that when I am able to take some of the qualities that I have found in my relationships and apply them to my professional relationships it can help me build strong and good relationships with the families I work with.  Communication is important, as well as realizing that everything takes time.  All relationships to me are give and take, and it is an investment of time.  Building trust and being unconditional with my own beliefs is key to working with families.  I may not always be right, and I need to support families with their choices.  I feel that being able to take my own personal feelings out of the mix, I can get a better understanding of their needs and their wants.  I feel that today I am good at establishing and maintaining my professional relationships, and when I am not connecting with a family, I need to look inside myself to figure that out.